Michael Jackson died - Autoerotic-asphyxiation over the cover of the boyscout popcorn flier.

ZING!

Oh gosh!! That is sooo wrong LaughingMan

but also so funny

Poor MJ was even going to relaunch his career with a 50 show tour in England. I will miss the music.

He died at 50? I smell conspiracy
i will bet a million dollars that Michael Jackson was murdered by the CIA by order of Barack Obama. being the first black president wasnt enough for Obama he also had to be the most popular black man in the world. to do that he had to kill the one black (sort of) man (sort of) more popular than him. Michael Jackson!
now i have to sit back and wait for the blackhawk choppers to come buzing my house and be hauled away to a government mind control facility, i mean "tolerance seminar".

...I'm not touching that with a 20 foot pole...

And I thought I was crazy.

You, sir, are AWESOME!

* Michael Jackson hasn’t been this stiff since Macully Culkin spent the night at Neverland Ranch.
* Because Jackson’s body was 95% plastic, he will be melted down and turned into legos, this way kids can play with him for a change.
* Reports that Michael Jackson has died of a heart attack in his home are untrue… He actually died having a stroke in the children’s ward.
* In the spirit of recycling, Michael Jackson will be melted down into plastic party cups so kids can still get their lips around his rim.
* In accordance with Michael Jackson’s will, little boys’ pants shall be flown at half-mast today.
* Doctors are looking into claims that MJ’s death could have been caused by an allergic reaction from eating 12 year old nuts.
* I heard Michael Jackson died of food poisoning from eating a 5 year old wiener.
* Micheal jackson will always be with us… he is not biodegradable.
* Farrah Fawcett arrived at the Pearly Gates and God asked her what he could do for her having led such an honest life. Farrah asked God to simply make sure the children of the world were safe. Five minutes later, Michael Jackson died.
* MJ’s dying wish was to be melted down and turned into straws so he can still get sucked on by kids.
* It has been released that MJs last wish was that he wants to be melted down and made into a slide so kids can go down on him forever.
* In memory of MJ’s death, McDonald’s is coming out with the new “McJackson”. It’s 50 year old meat between 12 year old buns.
* Michael Jackson’s ashes are going to be put in an Etch A Sketch so kids can still twiddle his knob.
* Michael Jackson’s death has now been ruled a suicide. Apparently doctors told him that the only way he could get whiter is if he died.
* Only in America can someone be born a poor black kid, and die a rich white woman.
* Madonna sent her condolences to the Jackson family. Then asked how much they wanted for the kids.
* Breaking News: Casper the friendly ghost was molested in the early hours of this morning!
* Michael Jackson’s last words: “Take me to the Children’s Hospital!”
* What was Michael Jacksons last hit? The floor!
* Michael Jackson died of a heart attack. He really shouldn’t have looked at the man in the mirror

Zimes, you win. No one can 'win' as much as you just did. There are 'winners' and then there is you. If all the 'winners' in the world got together, they still don't have as much 'win' as you do right now. Not even terms like 'epic win' can begin to do justice to your sheer amount of 'win'.

ADDENDUM


I'd be scared too


Webster (Emmanuel Lewis): The tiniest ass Michael Jackson could tap without setting off an Amber Alert.


Ever wonder why Macaulay Culkin disappeared from the public eye about the same time he started hanging out with Michael Jackson? Maybe "Home Alone" and "Wish Kid" took on a different meaning at Neverland Ranch.
Michael Jackson: "Do that Home Alone scream... okay, now hold very very still..."

Oh my gosh!!

You people are such jerks! The poor man died early and the world has lost a great musician and cultural idol. You don't understand that a lot of people are going to be affected by his death for years. Some people may even not be able to sleep at night because of Michael Jackson...

... just like Macaulay Culkin spending a night at Neverland Ranch