Playstation Home - Review - Playstation 3

Create a Character (Avatar)
The create an Avatar options in Home are actually really extensive. For the most part, you can create a very close (but never perfect) "3D You" in which to interact with others. You can change not only body shape, but also details like the broadness of your nose and chin, the height of your cheek bones, and so on and so forth. There are also presets that I call "Pick-A-Race" that enables you to change your race quickly instead of messing with the facial feature and skin tone options for hours on end.

What I HATE about the Avatar creation is clothing, or complete lack thereof. When Home first came out, every guy was wearing blue jeans and a gray overshirt, while every girl was wearing tight blue jeans and one of three possible shirts. It wasn't until later that I learned that you had to go to 'the Mall' and BUY (WITH REAL MONEY) new clothes! Each hat, pair of shoes, shirt, or whatever costs between $0.50 - $2.00 of REAL MONEY. And of course with everyone except perverts and pedophiles too cheap to care about buying clothes for their Avatar, everyone sticks with the default clothes.

My initial impression was that, despite having all this creative freedom in creating my character, I was just as distinguishable between other Avatars as one Smurf is with another.



And like The Smurfs, if you're a 'Smurfette', you're a gang rape victim waiting to happen. (See immediately below)


Interact With Others
If by 'interact' you mean "dozens of lonely video game nerds circling the nearest female avatar and staring at digital cleavage" then you're right on the money. I shit you not, if you don't have any other people in your Friends list, pretend you're a girl (make a female avatar), buy a short plaid skirt for $1.00 (real money), and dance for 3 minutes (having music to dance to is optional because for some reason it's not nearly as stupid or creepy as in real life). By the time you can finish humming 'The Bad Touch' by The Bloodhound Gang, you'll be in the center of a virtual bukaki circle attended by every nerd in a 50 foot radius, all of whom are striking stimulating conversations such as:

"Hey"
"Where u from?"
"U look good"
"ASL?" (Age, Sex, Location... scary that I actually know that...)
"i 8 inches"
"U want hard cox?"
(no text messaging because that would require the use of both hands)
And you wonder why these guys are on Home instead of on real dates...

To be fair, communicating with other people is simple. You either hit the triangle button and start punching in text with either the Dualshock 3 controller or (if you're lucky) a USB keyboard, or you hold the L2 button and speak into a headset. I have yet to hear what I sound like on the other end of a conversation, but if it's like the cat calls and cursing of everyone else in Home, then I probably sound like I'm giving oral sex to a live microphone.

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LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that was your funiest review yet!!!!!!!!!!
so true... even for you laughngman

When did I ever make a retarded gesture like "u look good" to your Avatar? We just played a few games of billiards and made small, and POLITE conversation with voicechat.

...I DID compliment you on your voice and English accent, though.

hahahaha!

eh, i thought home was alright for what it was. the review is funny but your exaggerating on a lot of the stuff about lines and how bad the theatre is. i actually want to see you do a video like the angry video game nerd or the spoony experiement and see if you actually get as pissed off about things the same w ay you write them. that would be sweet.

I think that would be good for all reviews. still, on my reviews I want at least one of these ass hats on standby so I can kick him in the nads repeatedly.

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ass hats on standby?

I've read that like 20 times and i still can't make sense of it. Who's the 'ass hat'?

programmers / project managers. basicly anyone who is responsible for deploying such a colorful peice of crap.

Ah, got it

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOUR HOME REVIEW IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




YOU'RE SITE IS NOW ON MY FAV LIST!! KEEP IT UP!!!!